I always come back to this place…

I have been gone for too long. But this is my little space on the interwebs, and I always come back to this place.

I love to write. I often write privately, but have gotten away from my public displays… I am not sure why. I love to share. My content and passion may change from time to time, but the one thing that stays the same is my love for the art of journaling. Publicly, privately, it doesn’t matter, I have a need to write.
I haven’t been here, to this place, in 3 long months. I can’t believe it has been that long!! There is so much that we have done. So much that was journal worthy, and yet it stayed couped up in my mind!! The hubs and I took a mini vaca to a neighboring state to catch some bands we follow. The munchkin, hubs, mom-in-law and I took a Make A Wish sponsored trip to Florida, which included 3 days at Disney, 2 days at Universal and a day at Sea World. Several things have happened in the last 3 months on the workforce front for me, most are not worthy of public recognition. I do still work outside the home and it is wearing thin on me.

And then we come to my mind, an endless trap of wanderment and ideas that swirl like glitter shaken in water. Which leads me to why I write. I need to get it out! I feel like there are little people running my brain and the little people need to share and vent….wow, reading that back really sounds kinda crazy!! But, honestly, it is the truth. I don’t have “voices” talking to me. But, I do have little dark shadow people, no bigger than the size of my pinky nail running around up there trying to keep things together. They see things, hear things, relate to messages, create messages, create ideas…always going. Running around, buzzing about, trying to figure out why we are all here and the purpose of their human (me). They feed me ideas, tell me when to be calm, tell me when I need to fight, and when it is OK to just go with the flow. They are my guides. And, they have decided to guide me on another adventure.

Last month, I decided to go back to school. Not the first time I have thought about this since obtaining my AA in 2006. A few years ago I was going to go to art school and a few years before that I wanted to be a doctor. One thing that always stuck in the back of my mind, the way back where the little shadow people like to file things, was the thought of Esthetics. I have always had a passion for skincare and makeup. Why not go back for that. It is a short program that leads to a diploma and license to practice. It would be like I am a dermatologist without the 10 years of med. school. Plus I could do makeup (legally) on the side. How fun would that be?? Well, when one of my guides talk I listen. Some one or some thing was telling me, not right now. I was to focus my energy on the world wide web, social media and nails… I am like nails?? REALLY?? I have always done my own nails. I have had some formal training in manicuring and artificial nails, but I never thought of nails as a career. So I did do research, and sure enough, it brought back a flood of memories of how much I really love nail art. I mean I still can’t let go of the skincare makeup thoughts, but definitely can’t do school right now. The cool thing with nails is, I may be able to use my past training to get licensed without even having to go back to school. Then there is the internet….a vast market where I can grow. So this page, collection or pages…blog… may yet again see a face lift. Please know that I am the same person behind it that I have always been. I have a love for occult, 50s, vintage… I am a new age Rockabilly. Maybe even borderline Psychobilly…truth be told. I will continue to talk about causes near and dear to me such as my son’s battle with Muscular Dystrophy and my husband and my struggles with mental illness. I will continue to be transparent and I have decided to write more! Why would I not?

This will be my little space to call my own and I am going to be focused mainly on beauty, fashion, art and life…

Until next time or until the little shadow people break free…

Tara Beth

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